In celebration of Valentine’s Day, today I’d like to share three strange ways that you can greatly improve your love life. If you’re single and looking to meet that someone special, I think that you’ll find these three tips truly helpful…
And if you’re not single, feel free to share this blog post with someone in your life who isn’t in a relationship, but who would love to be! I’m sure they’ll thank you for sharing this information with them.
These three strange ways that you can greatly improve your love life come to you courtesy of my son, love and relationships expert, Mat Boggs.
Mat is the co-author of the bestselling book, Project Everlasting. He’s also the creator of the Cracking the Man Code program, and he’s helped many, many smart, successful, heart-centered women find the man of their dreams and create relationships that they’ve been longing for.
And now, let’s get started!
TIP #1: Don’t Get Excited About Someone You’re About to Go Out With
This probably sounds counterintuitive. You’re probably thinking, “What do you mean, don’t get excited? I finally met someone amazing! I finally met someone who has all the qualities that I want, they are at the same place in their life that I am, and we’re actually connecting. Of course I’m excited!”
Feeling excited about someone new in this way is normal. However, did you know that excitement is actually a vibration of scarcity?
The only time we get excited is when we’re excited about something that we don’t currently have in our lives.
And, knowing that like attracts like, if we’re in a state of not currently having, then we will generate results of MORE not currently having!
And, because we can usually subconsciously pick up on the frequency that another person is vibrating from, when your date shows up and sees that you’re extremely excited to be there with them, it can often come across as desperation. And this can often turn them off from wanting to continue to get to know you better!
A much more welcoming vibration to come from is one in which you expect wonderful things to come your way, or just simply gratitude.
Gratitude is the frequency that’s harmonious with abundance. Coming from a frequency of gratitude just attracts more and more “having” of what you would truly love in your life.
For example: You’re an amazing person. Be grateful for your amazing life. And, expect that amazing people are going to come into your life! And when they do, be grateful for that experience, too.
Coming from this place will deliver a much greater experience for both you and the person you’re on a date with.
TIP #2: Forget the “Golden Rule”
Most of us have been raised to live by the “golden rule” – do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Makes sense, right? But not in relationships.
In a relationship, you ideally want to replace the golden rule with the “platinum rule” – do unto others as they want done unto them.
Why is this important?
Often, what your partner wants and needs from your relationship is not the same as what you want and need.
Men often want to feel appreciated, competent and respected, for example.
Keeping this in mind, a great thing that you can do if you’re in a relationship with a man is to ask him for his ideas, and then when he shares one, acknowledge him for it. You can even tell him it’s brilliant!
Women, on the other hand, generally want to feel cherished in a relationship.
They want to feel understood, seen, sexy, and safe. One of the greatest gifts a man can give to the woman he’s in a relationship with is to listen to her when she shares her challenges with you, rather than try to fix her problems.
TIP #3: Connect with People You are NOT Attracted to
At first, you may think that this doesn’t make sense. But it actually makes perfect sense when you understand the “Law of Social Momentum.”
What does an athlete do before he takes the field? He warms up his muscles. He warms up his legs and his body, so that when he takes the field, he doesn’t hurt himself or pull a muscle, and he’s ready to go. If he didn’t warm up, then when he took the field, it would be an awkward, slow start that probably wouldn’t produce the results that he wanted.
The same principles apply to your love life!
Oftentimes, people tend to stay in their cocoon and not talk to others. They wait until they actually see someone they’re interested in and then try to move forward and talk to them to get the wheels turning.
Doing this often creates an awkward, bumpy interaction.
So, to help create some “social momentum,” make an effort to talk to people that you are not interested in on a regular basis!
Chat with the person in the line with you at the grocery store. Talk to people around you at Starbucks. Talk to people, flirt with people, have fun, banter back and forth.
This way, when someone comes along that you’re attracted to, it’s second nature to include them in the conversation that you’re already having with everyone around you anyway… and this will enable you to build a connection much more quickly.
Don’t bottle up your attention and your goodwill. Share your love with everyone. Share your attention with others, and be a person of increase everywhere you go.